Never Had

Oscar Isaac - Never Had

I've been gone for so long now
Chasing everything that’s new
I've forgotten how I got here
I have not forgotten you
We were just children but our eyes opened and
You were all that i could see
You came close enough to know my heart beat but
Still not close enough for me

Through the good times and the bad
You were the best I never had
The only chance I wish I had to take
But there was no writing on the wall
No warning signs to follow
I know now and I just can't forget
You’re the best I never had

Nanana Mmmm

In this motel
Well passed midnight
When I’m bluer than a bruise
You come drifting in through the half light
In your funny yellow shoes
And I hope that’s you standing at my doorway
That’s the scratching of your key
And I hope this song I’m singing
Someday finds you
My letter to Elise

Through the good times and the bad
You were the best I never had
The only chance I wish I had to take
But there was no writing on the wall
No warning signs to follow
I know now and I just cant forget
You’re the best I never had
Nana nanana
Best I never had
Nana Nanana mmm
Best I never had
Nana Nanana

I love watching movie. Depending on my mood, sometimes I am game for action pack, sometimes I need some scary materials and sometimes I just wanna chill and laugh. The movie "10 years" has been on my computer for a while now and I was too busy to crack it open. I've got a day off today and thought, why not. 

Oscar Isaac, adorable in 10 Years

The movie is about a bunch of 28 years old adults returned home for their high school reunion party. They were faced with lots of different issues in their past, during high school time. Ex-relationships, the bullies and bullied, the high school prom queen that got knocked up, and you name it. Throughout the one hour duration, a lot of memories just kept knocking on my door. 

I remembered the one guy I met back in high school that I really fancied but it never got anywhere. We had a misunderstanding and we spent a year ignoring each other, which sounds pretty idiotic. We were both too proud to admit our stupidity and talk about it. He is now a father of a very adorable girl and I am truly happy for him. 

I also remembered the group of dear friends that I spent every single day of the entire senior high with. We did everything together and the goofy moments still stuck with me till now. The quick nap during lunch, the wild talk that got us all giggled.. we even went to college together just so we can still see each other. Somehow, something happened, somebody changed and we were friends once upon a time. It is a pity. She got married, she got married too, he has a girlfriend and I don't know what happen to the other guy. 

In the middle of contemplating my past, I heard him singing. Oscar Isaac, an actor who also performed in the movie, a song to Elise, a girl he liked in high school, but never a chance to speak to her. It reminded me of a time when a guy played and sang for me. He wrote a song about a girl he met back in school. She lived just down the hallway and he always saw her through the window. One day she came knocking at his door, they spoke and the sweet story carried on from there. The innocence of the lyrics just captured my heart and he made me felt like I was back in school where liking someone needs no reasons or prerequisites. 

How many of us can do it? Being with someone because you want to be, but not because he or she match your requirement. Let me ask you one question. Do you prefer to be with someone who match all your criteria on your list, but does not really connect with you; or you prefer someone who has some flaws but when your eyes met, you feel that butterfly in your stomach? I would go for latter. As I always say, when you meet someone who is meant to be, you will know. For me, he is always gonna have those little habits that I dislike, but those habits will turn to be the reasons why I love him, in time. You have to take a leap of faith, at all times, until you meet the right one. If you are always scare of getting hurt, then you are just marking time. 

My dearest girl always say we shouldn't make compromises from the very beginning and sell ourselves short because we deserve good men. I agreed with her, but I also know that at our age, good men are basically blockbuster movies that sold out. The movie that has great reviews by others but we never got a chance to watch it on big screen. I'd like to make my own blockbuster filled with action, romance, a rough patch and a happy ending. I don't want the highly reviewed good men. I want an ordinary man who would let me discover his goodness and only I get to do that; an ordinary man who makes me feel like I never had before.

For all my friends who are married or attached, whether he or she is good or bad, kiss them. Kiss them now. Every kiss you land on them, represent a reason why you are with them, till this very moment. For all my single friends, I wish you the best of luck in meeting him / her. Xoxo